My Jellybean

So, we're pregnant again. Wasn't sure if I had forgotten that or just been to busy to really let that fully sink in. I'm 12 weeks along and I'm really starting to get excited about our new little one. Matthew was referred to as Peanut until we found out he was a boy...so this child is Jellybean. I'm wondering if Matthew will continue to call this one Jellybean because that's all he says now. He likes to give kisses to Jellybean and tickle it. The other night he said he wanted to say good night to Jellybean...I have the sweetest and cutest kid, hands down!!

I'm starting to get my energy back, which is delightful. Eating is hit and miss but the doctor said I'm fine right now. I haven't had to get into maternity clothes quite yet and I'm trying to delay that as much as possible. I'm still able to run but have cut back my mileage and don't have to run everyday, though I would like to. I can also say that I ran a half-marathon pregnant...no one needs to know I was only a couple of weeks along. My one claim to fame...let me have it!

As the excitement begins to build about our Jellybean and continues for Matthew my prayers have become more about being the best mom I know how to be. Letting go of the things I don't and focusing on what I'm good at doing. I can love my son with all of me and when we heard Jellybean's heart beat last week, I knew that level of love would be possible again. I want to be fair, equal, and fun with both of my children. Will there be times that I'm stretched and wonder what I got myself into??? Sure, I've already had those. But ultimately God has blessed me with children and being their mom. I'm the best mom for them and I can either embrace that or compare myself to others. I'm choosing right now to embrace that and invest fully in the lives of my family...my priority (to include my loving husband that makes this possible).

So Jellybean,

We wait with expectation for you. I will treasure these times as I have been entrusted with taking care of you already even though I haven't even met you. Know that you have a family that is ready to love, support and raise you when you get here. You have blessed my life already and I have been taught many things already in these short few months. We believe in you and look forward to meeting you and know that you have a purpose and place in our family.